The Seductress is a Tester, Jusifier, Realist. This combination makes her a very confident, sexual, independent woman. She is a Diva – not in the dramatic sense (she is very level-headed) – but in the sense that she is strong, sexy, and has a presence that intimidates a lot of men.
That’s good news for any guy reading this, as you can move forward confidently. Simply understanding her and knowing how to handle her is massively attractive, as she sees most men as weak and insecure. This is very frustrating to her, as she is very horny, but also very career-focused. She doesn’t have time to coddle egos. In sense, her attitude screens out the weak.
If you can keep your cool, not get emotionally needy, and take care of her needs sexually, she will be a wild woman – one of the all-time greats in your little black book.
BUT, if you get upset when she is too busy to see you, or you appear nervous when talking with her, she will move on. She is not the kind of woman you can win back. Once she spots weakness, she is gone, and will never see you the same way again.
This doesn’t mean she is cold-hearted. She just needs a man. You don’t have to be super confident, or a stud in bed. You just have to keep your cool, and be giving in bed. If you are inexperienced, this woman would love to teach you how to please her.
When we talk about strength, we don’t mean acting macho or acting like you have no flaws. That behavior stems from insecurity and she can spot it a mile away. It actually conveys more strength – self-assuredness, really – to admit your flaws, and be comfortable with them. It’s sexier to approach her as a new experience – don’t bring your list of moves to the bedroom.
Explore her and find out what specifically drives her crazy.
Notice that most of this relationship is about sex. That’s because she doesn’t have time for much else. She probably isn’t looking for anything serious and thinks dating is silly. She wants a man who is her friend, her homeboy, respects her time, admires her intelligence and talent, and fucks her when she needs it. Not a bad job description…
Ironically, this is the best way to end up in a serious relationship with her. And the relationship terms will be optimal if you are a guy who is on his own path and has career and life goals. She won’t demand a lot of your time. Mutual respect for each other’s goals is the foundation for a long- term relationship.
She wants the ongoing experience of seducing you. She feels powerful when she can use her beauty, energy, and skill to turn you on. She likes to perpetually chase, but not in a schoolgirl way. Seducing a man is how she gets her power fix. Throughout the week, she will need an ego boost, and will need to feel sexy. She gets high knowing that a man is hungry for her, not because he is just horny, but because of something she did to excite him. WE have some some great techniques to get her in that state.
How She Gets What She Wants
The Seductress is surrounded by horny guys. She is sexy and confident, and men are handing their balls over left and right (pun intended). This is boring. She enjoys the attention to a degree – it’s better to be wanted than unwanted. But she is looking for a guy that is a challenge.
The degree of chasing here is different from the Playette and the Social Butterfly. You don’t have to tease her. You don’t have to play any games. By staying calm and talking to her like a normal person (no lines, smooth talk, or buying drinks), you look like a challenge simply by contrast (to all the other clowns chasing her). Typically she will show interest in you at this point. She has no problem taking the lead when she wants something (you).
The Seductress has no problem with sex. Her confidence in her ability to seduce and satisfy a man eliminates any fear of appearing easy or slutty. She’s not a slut, she’s a Seductress. A slut sleeps with men for attention. She sleeps with men because she enjoys it. A slut gets used. A Seductress uses men! As Charlie Sheen would say, that’s hot.
The Seductress may at some point want a family, but she knows that in this day and age, a women can’t rely on men to support them. She believes in being independent and paying her own bills. She is likely not going to be satisfied staying home until after she’s had kids. However, as with all women, she has the need to nurture her man in order to strengthen the bond. She does this by helping in practical ways (Realist). She can help you make professional connections to get your business off the ground. She likely knows a lot of people and has a good amount of influence in her field.
Let her help you, challenge her to seduce you, never lose your cool, and respect her.
Applied Technique (using 3-Function Analysis)
An aggressive approach won’t work. But a confident approach will. Remember what I said about confidence. She has seen it all, and she knows the difference between a macho act and real emotional stability. She knows the difference between cockiness and self-assuredness.
This means you should be very down to earth and casual in your approach. She’ll wonder why you aren’t fawning over her like every other guy. My favorite way to approach this type of women is to give her a genuine compliment, but in a way that says I’m used to beauty and it’s not a big deal.
For example, try locking eyes and telling her in a non-chalant tone, “you look nice tonight.” Hold eye contact for one more beat, and look away.
Nice? NICE? I’m just NICE? Who is this guy?
Like I said, it’s easy to garner the interest of the Seductress for two reasons. First, she loves to chase, to seduce – it’s how she gets her power fix. Second, every other guy is groveling to get in her pants. So it’s simply a matter of not doing that. She will naturally want to conquer you.
She interprets a man’s dominance by how comfortable he is making fun of himself (and her, but to lesser degree). Talk openly about your goals, failures, interests, and silly childhood memories, and your most recent embarrassing moment. And ask about hers as well. Keep the topic on passions, goals, and the mistakes that make us human.
One other thing – and this takes some experience to cultivate – pull your attention away at key moments. Get the sense of when the average guy (the old you) would try to make a move or try to say something smooth and seductive, and instead, look away and relax your body.
The absolute best topic to talk about with the Seductress is sex. And this is where you show your true colors. Where the average guy will get overly excited about discussing sex with such a, well, sexy woman, you keep your cool. She is always, ahem, sizing you up. There are some things she’s looking for.
She wants to make sure you’re packing a good tool for the job. You don’t have to be a pornstar, average, or even less-than average is fine, as long as you know how to use it. She interprets boasting and cockiness as overcompensation. But if you can laugh at yourself, it means you are secure…which implies that you are confident about what you can offer her sexually.
She needs to know that you have stamina. So don’t blow your load, conversationally. Don’t convey that you are super interested in her. Don’t get giggly and overly excited about sex. Talk about fucking women as if you are talking about the weather – no, scratch that – your favorite sports team. Here’s why.
She wants a man who is passionate. It’s no fun to give pleasure to someone who is unresponsive. And it’s no fun to think your lover is just going through the motions. She needs to know that once she turns you on, you will be an animal. Convey this by discussing sex, goals, and everything else, with enthusiasm.
Notice the difference between being horny and passionate. If you are telling her about how much you love to watch a woman’s ass bounce when you fuck her from behind, talk about it with feeling and excitement. But give no indication that you plan on doing this to her. She will WANT to be on the receiving end of your passion, and will want to MAKE you want to give it to her (and she’s wonderfully frustrated as to why you don’t already).
The last thing she is looking for is a giver. Men are selfish – she knows because she’s had a lot of them. She doesn’t need you to be an expert on cunnilingus, but she needs to know that you will ravish her body, because she is sexy, and she deserves it, dammit!
One word: mysterious. When you make eye contact, hold it for one extra beat than would be “platonic” or polite. Then look away. It’s kind of like you are saying, with in that one brief moment, “You want me.”
Keep a calm, slightly mischievous look on your face, as if you know something no one else does, and you are holding back a secret smile. You aren’t fooled by her swagger. You know she’s a sex kitten and just dying to sink her claws into you.
Find that distance between up close and personal, and distant and uninterested. Stay there. She is highly charged, and very aware of your body and proximity. That mid-zone is in between the +/- so that’s where the electricity happens.
Don’t get caught looking at her ass or tits. Boring, she thinks. She knows that good foreplay starts everywhere else. Let her catch you glancing at her neckline, her lips, her wavy and wild mane of black hair. Think about how much fun it’d be to grab a handful. She can see it in your eyes.
Why isn’t he making a move? I know he wants me..doesn’t he? I will have to work for this one!
Keep your touch light and subtle. She is a very physical woman and would certainly let you manhandle her. But that would kill the tension. A man who understands sexual tension, and can handle the electricity in the air is sooo sexy to the Seductress. She’s dying to seduce you and find out what you are like in bed.
Treat your touch like a tease. Every once in a while, graze her hand with yours. If you are standing close to her (e.g. in a crowded bar or club), let your crotch press against her hip or butt for a brief moment. If you speak into her eye, make sure she feels your breath against her neck.
Any incidental brushing against her breasts or ass is extremely exciting, as long as you don’t linger, because then you’ve given yourself away. Subtle smell her, but don’t say anything. She can feel it.
Once alone, and you can’t take it anymore, grab her – slow, strong, even a little rough – and kiss her. Try taking both her arms in your hands, and pushing her against a wall. Or take her head in your heads, look into her eyes, and lips, for a couple moments – time is frozen. Then embrace her lips with yours.
Start out slow and sensual. Explore her body. Don’t let her touch you. This will drive her crazy. Hold her hands above her head by her wrists. Hold a fistful of her hair, tilt her head, and lick her jugular vein up and down like an animal. Like you’re preparing her neck before you devour it.
Kiss, lick, grab, nibble, her everywhere. She will be dying to get a hold of your manhood. Make her wait. Before you put it all the way inside of her, tease her with the tip. Make her beg for it.
Mix it up. Slow, deep, shallow, hard and fast. But don’t turn it into a performance. Stay focused on her and adapt to her responses. If her body starts to spasm, her hips begin moving powerfully, her breathing speeds up, or she moans, keep on doing what you are doing!
The sex will be awesome. And when you explode, she is happy – she has won.
Rest up. Soon you’ll have to start the whole thing over. Remember, she must feel like she’s seducing you. She’ll want to when you get her aroused. You get her aroused by teasing with sparse, sensual touch, passionate conversation (talk about sex, but not about having sex with her), and a mysterious aloofness – you know she wants you.